Is this thing still on?

Soooo busy lately, it's retarded. But, I only have myself to blame. If I'm not doing a bazillion things at once, I get very bored.

Anyway, an issue which has been plaguing me since I began dating William may about to be resolved. I am ecstatic, but I can't show it, because William doesn't know I ever had a problem, and it's not really something I could say to him, because it would absolutely kill his self-esteem.

There is a huge TMI warning on the rest of this post, so avert your eyes if you so desire!!

I like circumcised men. I know there are people who have issues with this practice, and say it's barbaric and what not, but I just prefer them. I think circumcised penises (penii?) are more hygienic, more attractive, and they make sex more enjoyable. The downsides to uncircumcised penii are that they tend to "hold" on to bodily fluids, which means stopping penetration to perform oral sex is never an option (I like girls, but I don't particularly want to get a mouthful of my own... well... you know). They also make condom usage a bit difficult, as the foreskin slides up and down with the condom. I'm pretty sure I have previously told the story where a guy "lost" a condom whilst having sex with me, and didn't even tell me! I found it 2 weeks later attached to a tampon. I could have died from toxic shock!

Anyway. I don't like uncircumcised men. William is uncircumcised. But there's uncircumcised, and then there's uncircumcised. Apparently, some men are afflicted with an excess of foreskin. I have only previously come across this issue once before, and I can tell you I have never seen an uglier penis in my life. It was like a deflated balloon was hanging off the end. The foreskin hung 6cm off the end of the shaft. It was gross. But of course, I couldn't say so. I had to just pretend I didn't notice his penis looked like it had lost a fight with the crocodile in The Elephant's Child.

Afterwards, I was hoping never to come across such a problem again. And then I met William. Of course, I had the luck of finding the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, only to find out his penis disgusted me. It wasn't quite as bad as the previous case (about half as bad), but there was still very obviously an excess of skin. All of the downsides to an uncircumcised penis have come into play while we've been together. Plus the added disadvantage of me not ever really wanting to perform oral sex because I think his penis is gross. I tell myself it's irrational. It's just skin! Why do I care so much? I have no idea. I guess that's like saying a person with an arm growing out of their head shouldn't stir certain feelings inside you - it's just an arm, we've all got them. It's an interesting observation of the importance society places on aesthetics.

Anyway. I remember asking a male friend back when I first started dating William about whether it would ever be possible for me to tell him I had a problem with it, or whether I could ever suggest surgery to him. I was told in no uncertain terms that I could never do so, because it would crush him, and lead to severe self-esteem issues. Which is exactly the answer I thought I'd get. Imagine if he had told me he didn't like my boobs and wanted me to enlarge/reduce them? I imagine I would also be extremely hurt. So I have never said anything. Just sort of plodded my way through and tried to deal with it.

Well, last night William came home from the doctors and said he had to discuss something with me. I thought he was going to the doctors just for an issue he's having with his broken ankle, but apparently he also went to get a referral to a urologist! He wants to get a circumcision! Apparently, aside from the issues I have with it (slipping condoms, unhygienic), he has problems with it too! Apparently, when we have sex, because it slips up and down so much, it tends to tear. Apparently always in the same place, and obviously with much pain. I don't know why he's never told me this before. He says it's the main reason he doesn't really initiate sex much - he's always afraid of the pain, and then has to rest for a few days afterwards to let it heal.

He told me this, and then asked if I thought he was silly for thinking about getting one. I had to pretend to be all concerned and supportive, when inside I was thinking, "Are you kidding?! Go! Go now and get one! I can't wait!!!!"

So yeah. I just hope the urologist will agree to do it, and there are no complications. And I really hope it improves our time in the bedroom afterwards!